So, you’ve emerged from the clutches of illness like a wobbly newborn fawn, and your house is a germ-riddled battlefield. In the immortal words of Robin Williams, “I must disinfect!” The game plan for boogeyman busting– colds, flu, or the notorious COVID-hombre – means a deep clean to protect the tribe from catching your infectious groove.

Sharing Digs – Sick Edition

If your humble abode is occupied by fellow Earthlings, it’s of utmost importance to become a hermit when sick. This keeps your germ funk contained. Cough explosions, snot rockets, and intestinal mutinies all spew micro mischief. Door handles, clicker contraptions, and magical light sticks are the fomite playgrounds that keep the party going.

Avoidance Level: Pro Hermit

• Separate thyself from the masses
• Wipe down germ-tempting touch zones with a vengeance
• Keep doors closed like an antisocial dragon lair
• Let the breeze do a fresh air dance in the sick chamber
• Venture to a separate bedroom and bathroom, if possible
• Rock a mask like a bandit and scrub those mitts, to avoid respiratory snafus
• Keep your cups, towels, and toothpaste close to your chest, matey
• Delegate to disposables when it comes to edible utensils

This protocol can cease when you’re crispier than a potato chip again. However, a post-funky thorough de-gunk of the residence will allow everyone to breathe easy.

The Nitty Gritty: COVID Edition

A household stricken by COVID likely has you pondering the ultimate makeover: Post-Covid Deep Clean. Don’t fear, SARS-CoV-2 can be intimidated with a teaspoon of tough love. A squirt of soap dissolves its fatty armor like it’s hot. Weaponize that soap!

Disinfect protocol: Suit up with mask and gloves. Seek and destroy all surfaces the afflicted riddled with microbe-doom. Double down in rooms where the patient inflicted maximum viral damage.

Places of prime concern: Bathrooms, bedrooms, and vroom-vrooms

Note: Top-notch intel for slaying the coronavirus can be found in our comprehensive guide.

Book Nook Boogie: Bedroom Cleaning

Transform your sickbed back into a Zen den. Start by welcoming in sunshine and airflow; let them battle germs with their powers combined. Strip the bed bare and toss everything into the spin cycle of hot destruction. Sanitize mattress protectors and maybe even the mattress itself (steam cleaners work wonders).

Related: How To Clean and Disinfect a Mattress Like a Pro

Don’t neglect the patient’s wardrobe. Give clothing a piping hot whirl in the washing machine. Don’t forget your laundry bag – wash canvas ones and spray plastic or wooden ones with anti-disease magic spray.

Pro Tip: When brandishing disinfectant as your weapon of choice, heed to the label’s guidance. Amp the effectiveness with a generous application and air dry approach.

Target other touching points – bedside tables, clocks, and devices – with your diligent wipe-down skills. Vacuum or mop the floor (for extra credit, apply the soapy water or disinfectant Hokey Pokey).

Once you’ve obliterated those germs, it’s hand washing time! Hot water and soap will be your trusty sidekick, as they outshine hand sanitizer in the battle against COVID-19.

Mattress Makeover: Post-Covid Edition

Surviving the COVID scare means stepping up your Germ-Zilla game plan.

If not patient zero, gear up with gloves and mask
Strip the slumber zone and vacuum that mattress
Steam clean, if possible, or let baking soda sit for 4-24 hours, then vacuum
Spray fabric disinfectant or lather up fabric soap, dampen the mattress, then air dry

How long does Covid linger on a mattress?
The U.S. National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases conducted some recon on how long SARS-CoV-2 can stick around. While enjoying long stays on hard surfaces such as plastic and metal, it barely hangs on for a day or two on soft, porous surfaces like fabric and cardboard. So fear not, and live long and prosper!

Whassup, viral villains? Let’s rap about how long those pesky pathogens like to par-tay on various surfaces:

• SURFACE
  SARS-CoV-2 (The ‘Rona)
  FLU BUG
  NOROVIRUS (Tummy Trouble)
• FABRIC
  24-48 orbit spins
  8-12 cosmic hours
  A trifecta to quartet of sunsets
• PAPER /CARDBOARD
  Duo to trio of daybreaks
  A mere daily dalliance
  Again, 3-4 not-so-fun receptions
• PLASTIC
  3-4 deja vus
  48-72 hour ragers
  Fortnight to triple week soirees
• STAINLESS STEEL 
  Ditto the plastic scene
  The same 2-3 day groove
  2-3 wild weeks
• AIR
  4-6 high flyin’ hours
  3-4 hoverin’ hours
  Mysterious as the cosmos

Tip: Lean more about sanitizing detegrants: Clorox vs. Lysol: The Showdown of the COVID-19 Clean-a-Thon!

Now, post-sickness bathroom blitz! Bathrooms, the non-porous party pad, got lots of viral hiding spots. But fear not, my water warriors! Use hot, soapy H2O or an approved disinfect-o-spray to tackle these zones:

• Tub & cascading H2O dispenser
• Water basin & liquid source
• Porcelain throne (and scepter)
• Flat, elevated surfaces
• Vertical & horizontal planes
• Portal of entry & egress, plus grabbable lever

Don’t forget to cleanse all object d’arts the unwell individual encountered. Launder fluffy rectangles & foot-friendly floor accessories and wield a disinfectant wipe or soapy solution to vanquish germs from those bottles, paste tubes, and bristle wands.

Next up, toothbrush tactics after the sickness standoff. Zapped by a zany virus or bacteria? Don’t cling to discount dental devices, replace that bristle buddy every trimester anyway! If purifying your pearly white wand is a must, these methods may do the trick:
1. Mouthrinse or moonshine plunge for 5, followed by a freshwater finale

2. 3% hydrogen peroxide jacuzzi for 10, then a water rinse chaser

3. Denture cleaner like Polident for a sanitized scrubdown

Oh, and show TLC to all bristle budz in that germ-tainted lair.

How ’bout those chompers’ holsters, like Invisalign, retainers, or mouthguards? Consult your tooth doc, but a soapy scrub or 5-10 min dunk in antibacterial mouthwash or 3% hydrogen peroxide works wonders.

Don’t forget your hallowed car! That metal marvel needs love if you’ve been cruisin’ while under the weather. Soapy H2O or germ-killing swipes are clutch for these touch-heavy hotspots:

• Steering circle
• Twist & rain-wiper sticks
• Door-grab and side-stow space
• Tune & temp toggles
• Reflective road-looker
• Car-clothes switch
• Clicky lifesavers
• Hang-time handles

Vacuum debris, then show the seating & elbow pads some suds. Drench, don’t drown! Let it air out in sunshine central and let the windows breathe when safe.

Final thoughts from your wildest narrator: Post-plague purgatories aren’t our jive, but blitzin’ the bugs post-recovery keeps your co-habitants groovy, your visitors unfazed, and your dwelling bright & beautiful for peak post-healing vibes!